Saturday, April 30, 2011

Game Review: Minecraft

Minecraft




                Minecraft is a massively open single and multi-player sandbox game where the characters are placed on terra incognito and left to fend for themselves. The entire world is created of meter-by-meter sized cubes. There are a multitude of different types of blocks to find as well as truly infinite possibilities for each particular adventure. The entirety of the earth is moldable; the players can dig enormous trenches or build gargantuan castles that span across hundreds of kilometers of space.  Trees can be felled for wood, sand can be melted down to make glass, and immense cave structures can be discovered where players can spelunk at their leisure. The emphasis of the game is to explore and build your home from the materials you find. The map is essentially infinite (Yes, it does come to an end, but in order to reach the edge of playable space, the player must deliberately search for it) and each one is randomized. There are biomes of different climates and each has differing deposits of materials. There are free roaming NPCs in the forms of cows, sheep, pigs, chickens and most recently, tameable wolves. At night, however, the NPCs are joined by legions of the undead, gigantic spiders and skeletal archers.  Most horribly, bizarre, gangrenous creepers prey upon the player, lest they have built a shelter for themselves. As well as having a large online community, Minecraft also has tremendous single player value.  The replay value is bolstered significantly by the humongous and growing mod scene. New items, cities, maps, beautiful and silly textures, skin packs, and complete overhauls ensure that the game never gets stale. It recently sold its two-millionth copy.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Arthur (Movie; RomCom)


ARTHUR
Release: April, 2011
Genre: Romantic Comedy



I got suckered into seeing this movie recently and lost what could have been two very productive hours of my life.  Even if the time wasn’t used productively, I’d rather have stayed in the parking lot making a tiny beige Stonehenge out of discarded cigarette butts.  Arthur is a remake of the 1981 film, this time starring Russell Brand as the lead unlikable oaf.  Honestly, this film could’ve bit the bullet of self-parody and ran under the name of ‘Two Hours (That You Will Never Get Back) of Adventures by Several Wholly Uninteresting, Unlikable People’, and it might have less staggeringly awful.  I’m not going to write this review with a really nasty, hateful outlook because it’s fun to be mean. I’m going to write an honest, open review. This movie was terrible.



Friday, April 22, 2011

First Post/Leviathan/Mayhem (Music: Black Metal)

Hey there. For the inaugural post on The Snarl, I thought it would only make sense to introduce you to two of my favorite albums. I’ll be reviewing music, movies, art, products, events, people and anything else that comes my way. If you’re interested in having something reviewed, send me an email with your idea and I’ll see what I can do for you. For now, check out these two full reviews of two of the best black metal albums ever recorded.



LEVIATHAN – MASSIVE CONSPIRACY AGAINST ALL LIFE


            Type: LP
Producer: Moribund Cult
Release: March 24th, 2008

                Leviathan is an American black metal project composed entirely of one Jef Whitehead, otherwise known as Wrest. This 2008 masterpiece, Massive Conspiracy Against All Life is an apocalyptic series of grave, ambient tracks detailing not just the end of life on earth, but of the ultimate extinction of all matter in the universe. It begins with a slow, meager growling intro, but quickly picks up pace and turns into a maddening spiral into total oblivion. While it may seem simple, know that this piece is not just about the simplistic Armageddon of flames and devils, but of a microbial destruction, and of the creation of new life from the withered corpse of our universal ovum. Note the microscopic nature of some of the lyrics “Gone, as T-Lymphocytes” and “From a long, flagellated vessel”, and know that the original title for ‘Vulgar Asceticism’ was ‘A Flagellum Raised to the Sky’, a phrase which upends the sperm cell and points it at the ova of the earth.